Two Weddings and a Funeral

Just as I was sipping my morning tea, my cell phone, gave me a vibrating nudge. There was a text message. To my dismay, it coldly informed me, that a close associate had expired early that morning, and the funeral would be at 9=00 AM. I checked my other appointments for the day. I, was also scheduled to attend a wedding at 11=45 AM and a wedding reception along with my wife, Varsha, in the evening.

I, reached the घाट (cremation ground, on the river bank), a bit early. Quite a few of our set were already there.

"When is the cortege coming?, a newly arrived friend asked.
"They are waiting for his daughter to arrive from Pune." said another.
" Does that mean, we will have to wait here for the rest of the morning? another interposed with a degree of resignation.
" Why don't they inform all the relatives in advance? specially those who are far off".  This later remark brought out suppressed smiles all around.
"Don't be stupid", came a sharp rebuke, "He didn't know he was dying".
"He must have had some indication, if not he at least the family...", put in someone, helpfully.

The discussion went thus, later it shifted to the late monsoon, the political scams, the increasing power in the hands of  women (obviously as no women usually come to the ghat, which other place offers such a wonderful opportunity to deride those of the other sex.), the fall in the stock market, the rise in the price of Bullion, and land and commodities, and off course the latest achievements or otherwise of our 'men in blue'.

Once in a while, they remembered that they were at the "Ghat", for a specific purpose, and they would fall silent, and murmur under their breaths, that the departed was indeed a jolly good fellow. Never the less some one from the group would add, that though this was true, he had gone overboard with drink, and had brought this on himself.

After an hour or so, the cortege arrived. With the usual commotion that follows such an event, the rituals were performed and the body consigned to the flames. Every one was eager to leave, and soon the place was almost empty. Only the forlorn young sons of the dead, remained rooted near the burning pyre. I expressed my condolences to them, and too took my leave.

I, barely had half an hour to reach the wedding hall. The मंगलाष्टका (wedding invocations) had already begun, and along with other late-comers, I stood near the door of the hall showering blessings in the form of अक्षता ( rice grain) on the couple (off course not one grain of the rice thrown by me reached the couple, hope fully the blessings did!).This was done every time "सावधान", was uttered, by the officiating गुरुजी (priest). After the अंतरपाट (separating screen) was withdrawn, symbolising removal of all barriers between the couple, and  garlands were exchanged, we all went to the dining section for the wedding feast. An interesting fact to note, is that the guests will invariably dine before the couple, who would be occupied with the होम (offerings to the God of fire), and सप्तपदी (wedding vows) and sundry other poojas.

While dining I found myself in the very same company which was at the funeral. Obviously the morning discussions continued, the only difference was that, as the markets had opened, one could hear the latest performance of the SENSEX, and NIFTY, and off course the new twist in the 2G spectrum Scam!

The evening reception, was indeed another great opportunity for social intercourse. To the dismay of the early arrivals, the wedded couple hadn't yet arrived on stage. In a corner a lady was crooning old and new film songs, with a band in tow. The entire area was brightly lit, and buffet tables arranged all around.

Loitering here and there, I found myself again, with, who else but the same group. Now they were all in formals, and to complete the aesthetics, demanded by the occasion, were with their better halves, who were all aglitter with their gold and diamonds, exuding the loveliest of fragrances.

The ladies had their own topics, of how well their children had fared in the various entrance tests, and where they were seeking admissions, at the same time estimating the price of the sarees and the genuineness or otherwise of the jewelry their friends were wearing, and discussing which 'gym' offered the most effective 'weight reducing' programme, and where they could get the latest fashion accessories at a bargain. 

The men were again at the game of  'who knows more'. Finally the couple arrived on stage and we all stood in a queue to greet them. We helped ourselves to the exquisite fare that was on offer, and after some more discussions with colleagues and friends, we bid each other adieu, with a promise, to keep in touch. A promise we never keep, but we do manage to meet, off course at the next funeral or wedding. 

All Vacuums Eventually Fill Up!

Some time back, I attended a "Nikha". Nothing unusual in doing so, but this time the circumstances were different.
A few months back, one morning, I had just settled down with my cup of black tea, engrossed in savouring it's rich taste, which in it's finest form we all know, not only excites the taste buds, but its aroma, tingles the nostrils too. Suddenly one of my employees, Aslam, was standing before me. It was obvious from his dishevelled looks that some tragedy had befallen him. It was extremely difficult for 'the man' in him to speak out. Finally with tear filled eyes, he blurted out his story.
His wife Najma had eloped! The previous evening, when he returned from work she was not at home. It took some time for him to realise that she had gone away, as all her personal belongings too were absent. Soon it hit him that she had also taken with her their six year old son. Aslam had searched for her the whole night, but she was no where to be found. Their neighbourhood barber too was missing. It was obvious they had gone away together.
I advised him to exercise restraint and wait for the prodigals to return, he promised to stay calm. When even after four days she did not return nor could her whereabouts be traced, he filed a "missing persons" complaint with the local police. The police hardly did any thing to investigate the case. Even after a fortnight, when no news was forthcoming about their whereabouts, he went to the police station to inquire, whether they had any lead, to add salt to his already festering wound, one of the constables present, derisively remarked, "if you cannot keep your wife on leash, you have no right to have one". As weeks turned to months, Aslam became more and more despondent, he had now firmly decided that he would not take her back even if she returned. Yet he simply could not get over the loss of his son, even while at work (which I had cajoled him to recommence), I found him lost and distracted. He had not only lost his dignity, but was facing tremendous hardships too. A wife to an ordinary man like him, is not just his bed-mate, but one who keeps his hearth burning, looks after the children, and compliments his life. He now had no option but to find a new wife.

Through some relatives he got to know that a recently widowed young woman would consider the proposal. The girl hailed from the village Kanwad, which is just across the river from my place. Before any thing could be settled, the girl's parents expressed their desire to have a word with me. I consented and a meeting was arranged. They obviously wanted assurances from Aslam, and from me they wanted a guarantee that he would stick by his word. Knowing him for many years I accepted this role.

Once the proposal was accepted. I discretely asked the girl's uncle, about the circumstances regarding her husband's death. To my horror, he told me it was due to "the bimari", in other words he had died of HIV AIDS complications. I was stunned, and thought it best to call off the wedding, but after some pondering, I felt we could take a chance of her not being infected. I told them that she will have to undergo tests to rule out any infection. I also suggested that Aslam too should undergo the test with her. To my surprise they readily agreed, and the very next day, both of them took the test together. Luckily both turned out HIV negative.

The wedding was a simple affair, we went to the girls house, where the village elders had gathered, the Quazi too was present with the register. Before the formalisation of the union, Aslam had to give in writing on a "Bond Paper", that he would immediately give "Talaq" to his first wife if she ever returned. The "Wakil" and two "Gawahs" gave us the news that the girl was ready to accept him as her husband, and when he too declared his acceptance by uttering "Kabool", there was a round of applause. Prayers were then offered for the well being of the couple, by the Quazi, interspersed by "Amens" from the "Majlis".Thus the wedding was formalised. A simple feast was arranged for all those present, they had cooked separately for me as I am a veggie.

Tomorrow is "Id" and I have been invited by the couple to share their "Kheer". I, am certainly looking forward to it.